If you are a family who has undergone fertility treatment and have leftover embryos, and you feel that you have completed your family, you might be wondering what to do with the remaining embryos. This article will discuss your options.

Discarding the embryos

One of the options listed in fertility clinic documents, is to discard any remaining embryos. The frozen embryos are discarded as waste. Each clinic does this differently, and you want to discuss it with them, to see if you have a choice of how this is done. Some clinics give you the embryo/s in a vial for you to bury and possibly hold a ceremony or ritual to mark the passing of the embryo/s. Some clinics go as far as implanting the embryo/s in the woman’s uterus when pregnancy is not possible, so that the embryo is discarded naturally during the next woman’s menstrual cycle. There are some companies who are making jewellery out of frozen embryos. For discarding embryos, the fertility clinic would require consent.

Donating the embryos for medical research

Another option is to donate the embryos for medical research. Scientists would do research on the embryos to come up with any information that might be helpful to others. In the process of this research, the embryos are destroyed and won’t be used to potentially be born children. Again the fertility clinic would require your consent to be able to donate your embryos for medical research.

Donating the embryos to another family

Donating the embryos could be another option. This is where any remaining embryos are donated to a family, and through an agency and usually a legal process, the embryos would then become the ‘property’ of the receiving family. The receiving family would then be able to transfer the frozen embryos to the woman’s uterus for a potentially born child. Some fertility clinics do not offer this as an option, but if you advocate for this, the clinic would accommodate. Sometimes they would require you to find the receiving family or an agent to work with, to have this process completed.

As an advocate of embryo donation/adoption, I support donating the leftover embryos. Scientifically once an egg and sperm is fertilised, an embryo is created – which is the beginning of life. An embryo could be a potential child, an unborn child so to say. Therefore, I believe that any embryo should be given the chance to develop in a born child.

Making a decision

I understand that a decision is quite hard for some couples – some keep paying the freezer bills to keep the embryos frozen and stored so that they do not feel the burden of discarding any embryos. Some do not pay the freezer bills as it can be quite expensive, but they do not sign any consent of what to do with the embryos. In this case, the fertility clinic where the frozen embryos are stored, do not discard the embryos, as they are worried about liability and ethical reasons should the family ask for their embryos down the line, even if they were not paying for the freezer bills.

Some worry about donating their embryos to another family – they would have questions like: what would it feel like to know that you have biological children raised by a different family, or that their children have biological siblings raised by a different family. These are well-founded fears and worries. However, they can be addressed with the right support group. Personally I feel eternally grateful to the couple who donated their embryos to us – for me, they selflessly chose life for their embryos and knowing that any resulting children would be raised very well and loved; and in the process blessed us with one child so far. The agencies do a thorough vetting process to ensure that any family receiving embryos are well-meaning, and would care and love any resulting born children. I know a few families who have adopted embryos, and have children now, and I can attest that these families give the very best to the children. With regards to embryo adoption/donation, the donor family can choose if to have an ‘open’ relationship (where there is contact) or a ‘close’ relationship (where there is no contact – something like anonymous) with the receiving family and the resulting children.

Your story/question

If you have been impacted by leftover embryos, you can leave a comment below – maybe your story, maybe any questions/worry that you might have.